The moment has finally arrived, and you are overcome with a mixture of different emotions. Your baby girl that started flirting with boys too early in life, and who you were terrified would bring home the wrong boy, has finally found the right one.
As excited and anxious you are about her being engaged, you are also already stressing about the wedding. You are a mother of the bride, which means helping pay for a wedding and lots of hours of planning and preparing. It’s a lot to happen all at once!
So, before you start to panic, let’s go over 8 tips that will help you succeed at being mother of the bride:
1. Talk about and be honest when it comes to money
Before all the exciting planning comes the less fun job of sitting down and having a deep talk about money with the bride and groom. It’s so important to be completely open and honest about the wedding budget and deciding who is paying for what.
Remember that it is okay to say no to something if it’s going to go over budget. If they really want it, they will figure out how to cover the rest of the cost themselves. Boundaries are so important in having a healthy relationship with your daughter and soon to be son in-law.
2. Get involved in the planning process
Make sure to listen to what your daughter and her fiancée want for their wedding. Don’t be that stereotypical mother of the bride that takes over. Then, be specific with how you would like to help. If you can only handle a small list of responsibilities, then let them know. If you're willing to take on a huge list, then more power to you. The more you communicate, the less likely wedding tasks are to fall through the cracks or get dumped on you at the last minute.
3. Take time to meet his parents
Nothing helps ease the stress of a wedding more than when everyone gets along. Don’t be afraid to make the first move and reach out to his parents. Whether you like it or not they are going to be family, so might as well start building that relationship now. This will help them feel more a part of the wedding process and maybe they will be willing to help with some of the tasks on long wedding to-do list.
4. Be patient with the bride to be
Wedding planning is so stressful, and chances are that your daughter is also busy with work, school, or other projects. So, she probably won’t handle it all as gracefully as you would like. Remember to be patient with her. Pick your battles and avoid retaliating by being passive aggressive, because that will ruin the communication between both of you.
5. Find a dress that you love
If you can, take your daughter dress shopping with you. It’s good bonding time for you both and it always helps to have another person’s opinion when trying on clothes.
The wedding day is going to be a long day for you too, so make sure to pick a dress that you are comfortable in and enjoy wearing. Halftee has a new line of elegant wear that will make dress shopping a more pleasant experience. Check out our mesh, lace, and peekaboo womens undershirts that can easily be worn under any dress to modify it to your style and comfort.
6. Help your daughter stay relaxed from the engagement to the wedding day
The more relaxed the bride is, the less likely she is to turn into a bridezilla. Some good ways to do this is to be a voice of reason for her by remaining on neutral ground during any issues or drama that may arise. Then, make sure to keep any negativity away from her. She doesn’t need to hear about how Aunt May thinks the location is too far or that you don’t like the flavor of the cake.
7. Take care of yourself!
One of the most important parts about being a mother of the bride is to take care of yourself. You already have a ton on your plate plus a whole wedding! You are going to burn yourself out if you don’t take some much needed you time. Make sure you are eating and getting enough sleep. The last thing you or the bride need is for you to become over exhausted or sick. Take some time to meditate, get a massage or go see a movie. Whatever helps you relax for even just an hour.
8. Don’t forget to enjoy the wedding!
No matter how much you plan and prepare for the wedding, something is going to go wrong. That’s the hard truth. So, remember the day of the wedding to take it all in strides and focus on enjoying the moment. Before you know it, it will all be over so make sure you get some cake and dance to some tunes before it’s all just a memory.